Friday, May 30, 2008

more of you in my life

this phrase kept coming out of my mouth as I prayed tonight. I got up, googled it and found this video. It really ministered to me over just what I was praying about. I hope it ministers to you.

In case you missed it, the quotes on the screen were from Smith Wigglesworth. Have you ever heard of Smith Wigglesworth? What have you heard about him? Let me know in the comments section.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Keeping busy

That sounds like such a noble statement doesnt it? Im just trying to keep busy. Or, you have to keep busy. Of course we have all see those stupid...well I shouldnt call them stupid...just poorly misled...bumper stickers that say, "Jesus is coming so you better look busy." That is the thing...we are all too busy. On Memorial Day I was too busy playing with my new Crackberry to spend time with my girlfriend and friends from church who were just a few feet away from me. Too busy. And its not just Crackberries that keep us busy. We have been too busy for years. Even the great Jonathon Edwards talks about the business that was abundant in his life time when he says, "When we look at the world we see that people are exceedingly busy."

So, people were busy in the early 17oo's and we are still busy today. What drives all of our business? Edwards says it is our affections and I tend to agree with that. Our affections have gone astray and we have gotten busy with lesser things. Like CS Lewis says, its not that we dont have enough passion but our passions are too low! I dont even know what affections have been leading me but I do know this, in the last week I have been reminded of the fact that my affections are way out of kilter (whatever that means).

My friend John Robert Dobbs passed away last week in a tragic accident. He was a kid in the first youth group I was youth minister over and his Dad, John Dobbs, is the person who hooked me up with the Presidential Scholarship to Magnolia Bible College (I must give some thanks to my boy Gary Kirkendall too) which is what has led to me now working with Tal at Tapestry of Hope and finishing my M.Div. at Beeson instead of going down the road to pursuing my BA in finance and my MBA. So, I have a lot to be thankful to John for and we used to be really tight buddies.

As soon as I heard the news I sent out an email to about 30 people I thought to be people of prayer and I started praying to God (the God of all comfort) for him to give comfort to John and his family. I realized at this point just how disconnected I had become from my good friend John. And I thought to myself, "I should go down there for the memorial service." But I didnt. I should have, but I didnt. I dont know why. I have read blog posts by people from Tulsa, OK who were there but I didnt make the trip from Birmingham.

John Robert was a wonderful kid. Most of my memories of him are from when he was a young kid in the 5th grade. Some of the pictures I have seen of him are of him leading worship and he looks so different, so grown up. I hate that I missed all of those years with him. I really hate it. It is truly my loss. I dont want to loose the precious time I have with those who love me, those that I love. God has given me the gift of friends and I need to invest in that gift wisely. Its not that Im asking for more time with them, Im just confessing that I have wasted the gift of time God has given me. I dont want to be wasteful anymore.

Where have my affections gone? I dont know, but I know I dont like where they are. I love this man (John Dobbs) and I hope I get to spend some time with him really soon. I hope God opens up that door for me. I need to be asking, seeking, and knocking which is what Im going to do right now.